When Your Leadership Isn’t Landing the Way You Intend

The situation

You’re doing your best to lead well — but something feels off.
The same issues keep resurfacing. Conversations don’t land the way you expect. People go quiet, defensive, or disengaged, and you’re not entirely sure why.

You may be getting resistance, silence, or strong reactions that feel disproportionate to the situation — without anyone clearly naming what’s wrong.

What’s often happening underneath

This is often the sign of a leadership blind spot.

Blind spots aren’t flaws or failures. They’re patterns in how you show up that are obvious to others — but invisible from your vantage point. They form because leadership moves fast, and your brain relies on habits and shortcuts to keep things moving.

As your role becomes more senior, blind spots tend to increase — not because you’re doing something wrong, but because fewer people feel safe telling you the truth.

What helps

Here are practical ways to start surfacing blind spots:

• Ask for advice instead of feedback

  Advice often feels safer for people to offer and reveals more honest insight.

  You might say: “If you were me, what’s one thing you’d do differently in how I ran that meeting?”

• Watch for patterns, not one-offs

  Blind spots usually show up as recurring moments — silence, tension, or reactions that seem stronger than expected.

  You might notice yourself thinking: “We keep getting the same kind of resistance in meetings — I wonder what I might be missing.”

• Pay attention to tone and body language

  You may feel neutral inside while others experience urgency, crossed arms, or clipped tone as pressure.

  You might reflect afterward: “I thought I was being calm and composed — but I wonder if it came across as distant or shut down.”

• Use a trusted mirror

  Ask a peer, mentor, or colleague to help you see what you might be missing.

  You might say: “What’s something I might not be seeing about how I show up in meetings?”

• Model curiosity about yourself

  When you openly examine your own blind spots, it creates safety for others to grow too.

  You might say to your team: “I’m realizing I may jump to solutions too quickly — I’d like to practice listening more before I respond.”

Listen to the podcast episode

🎧 Blind Spots That Quietly Sabotage Your Leadership (Ep. 41)